Miller January 2025 Monthly Update
- JM Miller
- 5 days ago
- 29 min read
[[ I have been wanting to ramble for a while, so forgive me for this long post ]]
What a wonderful way to begin the year! We have officially moved!
Though we are still recovering very slowly from it almost five weeks later.
This past week we have been hit pretty hard with trauma processing so we haven't been able to do much. I've been spending many hours just sitting in a daze unable to form sentences or cohesive thoughts. Just taking it easy to allow ourselves to process out these things that were done to us after decades of having to hold onto them. It'll take quite a few months to a couple years to finally be free from the majority of this weight.
We haven’t unpacked everything yet, but we are going to be very purposeful when unpacking and checking EVERYTHING we took with us:
“Do we still want this? Was it worth moving? Are we going to use this? What idea did we already have for it, and are we going to be able to get to it within the next year? Is the item easy to find, or will we be able to come across it again in the next year or so when we actually need it?”
That’s a lot of overhead questions. There is a mental load in keeping so many items around you, especially when each item carries a tag with all the ideas you planned on doing with it — or the hope that a plan might form for it someday.
Sometimes the mental space gained from letting it go is worth far more than the price you paid for it.
At the end of last year, we talked things over and built new and improved plans for our business: what we wanted to keep, what we wanted to get rid of, and what we wanted to add. To be fair, when we first started, we didn’t entirely know what we wanted to do. There were so many personal struggles we had to focus on first — like the basics: “Who are we, and what do we even like?”
Over the past two years, we have tested and tried many things, challenging ourselves to improve and to finally delve into things we had wanted to do for decades.
I think it was really around October when everything came together. Which that started (at least that we see now) the very carefully detailed difference between two terms I had been wrestling with since childhood.
I want to add that there is a difference between being “lucky” and being “blessed.”
From someone who grew up having some of the worst luck for 30 years… there is NO way I could have gotten all of this by coincidence. Luck is simply something happening more likely than not in your favor. But it isn’t tailored to you or your situation — it’s just a result you’ll probably like.
This is also where I may want to delve into the topic of luck versus spiritual attacks or inherited generational curses. There were over 20 years of these strange, invisible walls — “This wall exists for me because I can feel the impact of hitting it… but it doesn’t exist for anyone else around me.” That only changed after a specific Prayer Soak at High Place Ministries, when it suddenly lightened and shifted. More on that later in a different blog post.
It’s very odd, but it makes the world feel so much bigger and more exciting because of the firsthand experiences I’ve had. I know it exists. And when you walk in it… things change.
So how do we know we have been blessed? Let's go over some big key points for us over the past few months:
Once we learned about Emotional Neglect and worked on addressing it in a Biblical sense, we were finally ready for the next steps in every aspect of life. The information came at a time when we were at our limit — breaking, both individually and with each other. But after a few months of carefully working through it using the book Running on Empty, we have already grown significantly and are ready to move forward. KEY information that basically spoke my entire life back to me. Breaking… but we were finally seen.
We got a case display for our products at American Classics Marketplace — a huge step in having a solid location to show our art, our products, and to connect people to our website. It’s also a great place to store our products and get them out of the home, keeping them safe from being lost or damaged especially during our move. A small but consistent way to advertise ourselves in the community.
That’s huge for us, after being terrified our whole lives of being seen — unsure of who we are and afraid of backlash for what we choose. We are stepping out and becoming more confident in who we are with more positive feedback than we have ever gotten as children. So this is exciting!
In 2025, we decided to look at the market around us to see if there were apartments we could move into, since rent was increasing while benefits were shrinking. The area around us was getting worse, and the apartment we were in was causing far more pain than it was worth. Then we came across a perfect market of locations offering so much more for hundreds less than what we were currently paying. Save $200 while gaining 300 feet more? Yes PLEASE!
We only looked at three locations before finding one that fit us perfectly. The layout, size, and price were completely unexpected. You would have had to be checking at exactly the right time and be willing to move in the middle of winter — which worked perfectly for us because of when our lease ended.
After our first year at the last location, we were expecting and hoping to move. So many things were going on that we ended up having to stay there for 5 years. This was the timing that was for us!
John carries a lot of stress and trauma around moving because of his childhood, so the two months of packing were very difficult for him. I was full of excitement and energy and just wanted to get everything packed and out. He rode on my excitement to keep going until the move was over. And the location we chose just kept proving itself to be more and more perfect for us.
There were many growing reasons to leave the area: the Safeway across the street was closed; the guy who bought our dead vehicle racked up violation tolls on my old license plate and then threatened to shoot my husband (we got the cops involved); more drug busts started happening in the parking lot the Safeway used to be in; and the apartment itself was driving us insane in ways that directly impacted our mental, emotional, and physical health. More on that later. It was reaching a tipping point — and it became very clear that it was time to get out.
Around the same time, my dad was ready to give us his 2014 vehicle. He was preparing for toe surgery and wouldn’t be able to drive for a while, and he really wanted to get a new vehicle he had been eyeing. Our car broke down in June. We got another car, but it turned out not to be great, needed fixes we couldn’t afford, and had to be gotten rid of ASAP. We borrowed vehicles for about three months… and then we were given a vehicle!
My parents successfully sold their house back in 2025 and left some money to us as an investment into our business. My other siblings also received a share, though I’m not sure if they’re going to do much with it anytime soon. We were already planning and prepared to invest in what we would need to grow our business, so this was exceptionally good timing. It meant we could use the money wisely.
In 2026, new lease terms were implemented where everything starts and ends on the 1st of the month. That meant our lease, which was supposed to end on the 14th, actually ended two weeks earlier. The location we were moving into was going to be open on the 3rd, which left a three-day gap before we could move in. But that also meant we wouldn't be forced to pay for a week there that we wouldn't be present for.
My parents allowed us to store many of our containers in their garage, though we couldn’t store everything. Instead, the location we were moving from allowed us to stay until the 4th so we could get everything out and clean up afterward.
The U-Haul we rented was just across the street by the Safeway. Everything was done online, so we were able to pick it up at 7 a.m. and start moving early. Means we didn't have to move our car back and forth and could just walk there.
I had been worried about where we would park the truck when it came time to move. For the two days leading up to it, I kept watching the two parking spots closest to us, hoping we could move our car there to claim the space. It never happened — but when we came back with the U-Haul, there was an open spot just two spaces down, which worked out wonderfully! It wasn't there when we left to pick up the truck.
This was the first time John and I have moved together and had friends help us! We are so grateful to have such amazing people willing to go through so much for us. It meant a lot that we had such great company — people who were busy but still made time for us. And ALL of them said they would be there… and they were. We greatly appreciate the integrity and love they showed us.
We moved on January 3rd, and the day ended up being bright and clear — one of the best winter days to move. This was one of the BIGGEST blessings. Weather that is on our side during the middle of winter? BLESSING! Not luck! Because the timing was impeccable, the cold and 'winter' side of the season starting sinking in once it hit 6pm. Well after we finished moving.
We were so exhausted from the 3rd that we did what we could on the 4th to clean up, but it was a Sunday, so we couldn’t turn in the keys. That gave us an extra day to handle last-minute things we couldn’t manage on the 3rd due to exhaustion. We got some rest for about half a day before another huge push.
Half a day sounds like a lot, but for our health, it’s unfortunately not even close to enough. Imagine working a four-hour strenuous shift without being able to take a breather. Then you finally get a five-minute pause because something is processing and you’re forced to wait — only to jump right back in, knowing you still have another four hours ahead of you. That pause kind of helps, but once you start again, it feels like the rest never existed.
But we managed! (Because we’ve done this too many times… it’s the
stopping we struggle with — unless it involves complete collapse.)
So remember how I said we were exhausted? Our excitement was well above our fatigue (which is dangerous), but we still managed to get our office set up a bit to start enjoying it — literally the next day. So either the 4th or the 5th, we started on the office and front room before allowing ourselves to stop and rest from moving.
You don’t know how EXCITED we are for this! A photo from a few weeks later will be down below. My area of the office makes me so happy to see!
A day or so after that, the biggest snowstorm hit — well after we had moved in and stocked up on supplies to stay inside. Even though we didn’t have everything yet from my parents’ garage, we had enough to work on during that time so we could make space for the next load.
This apartment is extremely quiet. There are some loud moments, but overall it’s very peaceful. Very different from our last location. We used to live across the way from a couple that would yell and scream their marital issues almost daily our first two years there...here we still haven't heard ONE person yelling/screaming after a month of constantly being home here. Love the peace so much.
The people here are genuinely friendly, which is honestly a little shocking after coming from a place where people were generally grumpy and untrusting. Many people there stayed a year or less as they moved on to other places or jobs, so you often encountered folks who were overworked and unable to rest. Also maintenance and company who are in charge of the place were terrible causing so much stress for people living AND working there!
Here, John went out to take the trash, and one neighbor rushed to help open the lid
while another opened the door for him. It was so nice. They also sincerely smile and
wave when you walk by!
The apartment layout — both inside and where we’re positioned in the building — is perfect. We can absolutely see why the previous tenants lived here for 11 years. In the mornings, we get lovely warm sunlight in the front room where we relax and craft… or sometimes fall asleep in the sunshine. In the evenings, we move to the office to work.
With our lifestyle focused on unraveling panic that has been cutting our sleep down to three hours at a time, these slow, relaxing mornings have been such a blessing. It’s a stark realization that life here is genuinely good after what we used to live through and even tried to build at the last location. Even when we wake up crying or in a heavy daze from nightmares… reality is still worth being present for.
We LOVE our office. We took over the master bedroom and turned it into our workspace since it’s the biggest room. At our last place, I had a very bad habit of taking work to bed. Now, since the bedroom is much smaller, I’m far less likely to drag work in there — or have to drag it back out or crush it trying to get through the door. That alone has been a huge step in protecting my sleep. Having the office separate is already doing so much for our sleep habits. We both tend to turn ourselves into workaholics perpetuating our exhaustion. This layout is perfect to start establishing some patterns. Last location rooms were basically all connected except one room with a door so there wasn't much of a mental transition from work to rest. It was all shoved into the one odd shaped space. This will give us a chance to breakaway from what needs to be done until we are ready.
There’s also a Safeway nearby! It’s a little farther away, but it takes about the same amount of time to get there. The location is smaller, but it’s better stocked, has better item selection, and is much quieter. We even ran into a former Safeway employee we knew from our old location — he works there now!
We also know this is a great place because we’ve spotted two familiar cars that moved in around the same time we did — from our previous apartment complex. We parked next to them for years before, so it’s hilarious to see them here too.
The first two projects I had to complete during our first week here were two Fathers in the Field end-of-the-year albums. It would have been far more stressful if not for the move and the snowstorm cutting into our time, but we always had a little more time than originally planned — so everything went smoothly. I was able to still rest while getting these completed.
Our finances have stabilized… even with ongoing threats of loss or cuts. We had waited almost a year past when DHS was supposed to work on John’s case — which was covering my income — and they said they had pushed my payments beyond leniency. Even so, while waiting for government approval, they continued paying me in hopes that the paperwork would eventually be signed and caught up.
Something that was due in February wasn’t approved until December of that year —
and yet my pay never faltered.
That may already sound amazing, but what makes it even bigger is this: growing up, my “luck stat” felt like 0%. The odds of anything going my way were laughable. It’s incredibly disheartening when, anytime there’s a chance involved, you get the worst possible outcome. After decades of that, I stopped hoping for good results and started expecting the worst — because that’s what usually happened.
John’s luck stat has always been really good. When there was a luck-based or chance-based game or competition, he would most likely win — getting prizes like TVs, game systems, and decent sized cash prizes. But a lot of those ended up being taken away because of parental emotional decision-making to benefit themselves, or out of jealousy. So he didn’t always get to enjoy the benefits of his luck stat.
Keep in mind, this was also what balanced out my “bad luck” stat. Things rarely went my way, but if they went his way, I got some benefit — even if it was just being able to celebrate and enjoy his win with him. Even then, I still rarely had things going for me. It mostly meant that less was taken from me or done to me. Still, that was some progress after so many decades.
On top of that, there’s another layer here involving spiritual warfare. After the second prayer soak, I honestly can’t describe how dramatic the change has been. Watching things actually go my way — consistently — has been unreal. Three months of major benefits coming our way, when growing up I might not have seen one of these in years.
That lived difference can’t be ignored.
I really want to encourage others to try this if they’ve been hitting barriers and truly want to see their life improve. I know people often brush it off with responses like, “Oh, that’s just a story they tell,” or “That just happens for some people.” But no — not just for me, not just for John. For anyone willing and wanting that change. I want you to experience it firsthand. But you have to trust what is greater than you and follow a loving life to its fullest. It sounds easy… but it’s actually one of the hardest things to do — especially loving those you feel don’t deserve it. I won’t go too deeply into that right now. I’m still forming how I want to tell and share this story and process in more detail.
Just know that this layer is extremely important and drastic in everything we do and live for. The spiritual realm should never be ignored or forgotten. If you are struggling and have tried everything with disheartening results… it may be time to address this aspect of your life. I thought I was attuned to the spiritual — but I was attuned to the spiritual blockage.
Yes there are versus in the Bible that state that evil can block and prevent blessings from being received by you. And I think we all know that there is no way to go through life avoiding it...let alone avoid it being passed down through generations.
This also ties very strongly into generational trauma. I’ve recently been diving more into information about curses being passed down through DNA. We already know that skills and abilities can be passed down to our children. A recent research paper came out (I need to find the exact one again) stating that when a parent pushes themselves to learn a new skill and becomes good at it, if they have a child afterward, that child benefits from having a foundation already in place. They may pick it up more quickly or be able to take it further. So we’ve essentially benefited from hundreds of generations of accumulated skills.
How crazy — and exciting — is that!?
Ok back to the original direction!
A new home and new patterns mean we can relax more. That’s both good and hard: good because it allows us to respond better in EMDR, and hard because it means more traumatizing memories will surface. Still, that’s a positive — because it means we can finally process them and move forward. I’ve been waiting for this for over ten years, and it’s time to begin.
As our time here continues, we’re encountering more and more blessings that feel meant for us. The timing of things goes far beyond coincidence. The frequency and precision feel too… planned.
This is only the surface of what I could remember from the past few months — watching it all unfold during and after the move. More blessings waiting for us is a blessing in itself.
And what’s incredible is that we can see them ahead of us.
Now it’s just a matter of timing. We’ll have to wait and see.
Another reason why I say blessing… these are also steps forward for us. These events going our way aren’t just to spoil us. They were challenges meant to bring us to the right level of maturity for the next chapter of our lives. This is a new playing field we’re getting ready for. We’ve been given these gifts to help us grow and expand — an investment into thriving and improving. These things roll into and accumulate with every step forward into something bigger and greater.
When I say blessed, I mean there are so many pieces moving in our favor. We prayed to move for about two years, but there were many personal issues we needed to work through first. Why? Because we did not want to bring those into a new home and taint it with prior problems. So we faced them, worked on them individually and together, and now we’re here. And this wasn't easy. It was probably one of the most difficult things we had done.
And that's saying a lot having gone through multiple violent and abusive relationships in our lives prior to each other.
We hadn’t perfected understanding every lesson, but we recognized them, accepted them, and took action with the intent to continue improving — while trusting God to take care of the rest.
And honestly… it worked out far better than anything we had done cumulatively up to this point.
This year, we’re writing our story and would love to share how much we struggled before you may have even met us — or, for some family members, for as long as you’ve known us. From the darkness of wanting the worst to happen just to justify our pain… to wanting to thrive, enjoy life, and help others do the same.
It’s been a wild ride.
**Photo was taken about two weeks later after moving in, but this is exactly what I wanted my office to look like, and I’m excited to be setting up for the next few years of working on all these specific projects.
So January was all about moving, getting things set up, and resting. We’re carrying over last year’s practices and focus on rest so we can continue building better habits. This year’s focus word is FOUNDATIONS.
In every aspect of our lives, we’re examining our lifestyle, our patterns — both current and from our previous place — and deciding which ones we want to improve. Because we struggle with changing patterns (dissociation, time blindness, pathological demand avoidance, chronic fatigue and exhaustion, stress from transitions, etc.), we have to be extremely patient and full of grace with every attempt.
Even something small that I know will benefit me can cause me to just stare at it while walking around it. It’s like two magnets repelling each other — you can get close, but it always pushes you away. That’s exactly what it feels like internally. I may want it and feel excited about it… but there are days when my body and mind are just a solid NOPE, and I have to honor that. I don’t always have full control of my body, and I have to accept that.
This is where discipline becomes really interesting.
Mind if I get into this? I’ve been unpacking the terms “discipline” and “control” with my therapist the past two-three months. In my family’s household, those were very strict and harsh concepts. Not being able to maintain them perfectly meant your value as a person went down.
Except… they aren’t supposed to work like that. At least, they shouldn’t.
I nearly broke myself trying to maintain extreme levels of discipline and control — over myself, others, and my surroundings. It was maddening and impossible.
Now I can see that even though I did an impressive job, I could have given myself more grace and let go of tying my worth to performance. I’m learning that forgetting something one day because you’re completely exhausted isn’t breaking discipline — it’s recognizing your limits and where you are right now.
I was stressing because we hadn’t kept up with devotionals, and after the move I stressed about restarting that pattern. But the pressure itself made me avoid it entirely. It was only about 15 minutes a day, but the mental shift required created more resistance than usual.
So what did we change it to? A short prayer together every morning to start the day — even if it’s only five minutes.
For now, that’s okay. When things improve, we’ll add more. And if we go over that time, great!
After all, it would be pretty ironic to force ourselves through stress over a devotional titled A Year of Slowing Down — Unhurried Living.
If we’re meant to live in peace, we have to build habits that allow peace to actually live here.
That leads into the idea of control, which honestly deserves its own rambling post. This one got deeper than I expected, and I’m still working through parts of it — so more on that later.
But in short, my learned definition of control came from my parents: things must be done or respond exactly as intended. That definition might work for objects or systems — but not for human beings. It’s too rigid, too unforgiving, and especially harmful when applied to children. Letting go of that expectation of perfection has been necessary for healing.
Being here has helped us reflect on just how much we’ve learned to reach this point — and how far we’ve come by letting go and trusting something greater than ourselves.
I really bounced all over the place here, didn’t I? Also, lucky for you, I removed about two full pages of rambling. I may rewrite and share that later, but it felt out of place here. I’m still exhausted, and my brain has been foggy most of the past few days.
I think I’m finally processing some dreams, though I don’t remember them when I wake up. I know they’re there because I wake up on the verge of tears or already crying, feel grumpier than usual, and have a strong urge to just sit and stare at the wall or the floor for an hour here and there. For a few hours after waking, I struggle to finish sentences or remember what I was saying halfway through.
One day, all I wanted to do was lie face-down on the floor and not move. My body and emotions were in a heavy haze, while my mind was barely functional.
Safe to say, I’m exhausted and carrying a lot right now. I can usually only sleep about three hours at a time — and rarely even that. I need two to three naps a day just to make it through. That means allowing myself not only the sleep, but also the extra time afterward when my brain is still processing whatever came up while I rested.
John’s sleep isn’t any better, but he’s trying to support me as I go through this process since it’s finally my turn. His turn was about a year and a half ago, and because he’s already been through it, he can usually sense what might be going on.
It’s difficult this round because I can’t tell what I’m feeling or what I need. So we both just sit there confused, knowing I need something — but since everything is in a haze (and I have alexithymia), being able to distinguish feelings internally is almost impossible.
In the mornings, we take our time waking up, then move to the other room to sit in the sunshine and craft. This needs to become more of a pattern, especially since our business centers around crafting — which means we actually need to be crafting. How exciting that we get to work through all the materials we’ve stored up over the years!
At our old place, we oddly felt guilty making things. That may have been lingering effects from childhood — a value conflict between family hive-mind expectations and our autonomy. This new home has helped us break free from that, especially since creating is how we de-stress and communicate. It’s incredibly important to us.
Okay… sorry it took so long to get here — but here we are. Only the end of page eight at this point.
Kind of rolling into what I just covered… which means we MADE STUFF!!
John has been focusing on a new postage-stamp-style art collection inspired by an artist we admire who recently released their work on stamps. He didn’t want to copy their artwork, but rather draw from their style, so he created his own subjects and designs for his own set. Some of them will include cryptids.
He said it was okay to share his artwork!
I think these will be up for sale at some point. He isn’t entirely sure yet, since his current focus is completing a full set of 10. Right now, he has seven of his own designs finished. The raccoon one ended up being too close to the artist he’s drawing inspiration from, so he decided not to release that one.
Aren’t they adorable? He hand-draws the designs, plans out the layers, cuts out all the pieces, and then glues everything down. See the little center pieces of the letters? He cuts those out by hand and then carefully glues them back into their exact spots.
If you’d like to commission him for artwork like this, please feel free to send a message! Just keep in mind that each piece takes about a day or two to complete.
I’ve made some new art too! I completed a small framed art piece, and I also finished a mini junk journal I came across and decided to challenge myself to complete quickly. It took about three days on and off, and I’m quite pleased with how it turned out.
We are an art business...so we need to be constantly be creating art. So this year, there should be a LOT more to show you. If we can, we will be unearthing and sharing some older artwork as well. There are so many finished and unfinished pieces laying around everywhere!
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I’m also continuing another little project I have… sobs I have so many.
These little figures were created from leftover bits from my other projects. Over the past few years, I’ve pushed myself to see how much I could recycle, reuse, or upcycle — turning materials I already had into something new that others (or I) would enjoy. At this point, I’ve made around 60 of them, with many more on the way.
Since they weren’t part of a main project, they ended up shoved into small containers. Now I’m working on storing them more nicely for when it’s time to use them. I’m even starting a small worldbuilding project with them as practice for when it’s time to work on my Isekai project.
I’ve started a small website for them — mostly to experiment with organization and storytelling layout. This uses a completely different mental track that I have to basically re-find before I can really do anything with it. So this is low-pressure practice that I work on when I can — usually when John is cooking or busy and I’m avoiding anything that would require too much energy.
Sherlock has been LOVING the new home. She has so many places to nap happily, there’s tons of direct morning sunshine, a tree outside our window full of squirrels and birds chatting away, AND a dog park beneath the window for her to judge all the doggos that stop by!
We’ve started a pattern of going into the living room to craft in the sunshine. When we tried to change that routine, Sherlock got upset — avoiding us or becoming grumpy.
Meanwhile, we were getting grumpy too, because we need our daily crafting time to stay sane. I wish that were an exaggeration, but it genuinely impacts us if we skip it.
So for everyone’s health — mornings are officially for sunshine and crafting.
She loves the sunshine...and stepping on our stuff as we work. Right as I asked her NOT to step on my stuff in the first picture...she immediately flops on top of it and rolls around as you can see. Too cute, can't be mad.
Because we won’t have much floor space for the next couple of months, I gathered all of Sherlock’s toys and put them into one container. I still wanted her to have access to them, so I leave it open — and occasionally she’ll dunk her entire head in to grab one. It’s hilarious, and I highly recommend this setup for anyone with cats.
I didn’t make this art last month, but I did finally finish it. I really love this style, and I know it won’t be everyone’s thing — and that’s okay. I’m much more confident now in the idea that if I like it, that’s what matters. There will always be someone else out there who enjoys it too, whether or not I ever meet them.
Until then, I’ll enjoy it.
John did mention there’s an art exhibition focused on Weird Art, and this piece would definitely fit. So I’m excited that there may be a specific place to show this style of work that I love doing.
I also have… yet another project in progress — but this one ties directly into writing my story. I need a hands-on, very visual stage to process things, so I’ve been mapping out different stages of my life: what happened, when things shifted, and where certain changes may have occurred. My goal is to bring this into therapy to work through it, then incorporate that understanding into my writing.
I want to make sure the details and information are as accurate and validated as possible. I’ve separated my life into different phases — from being a generally carefree child, to becoming suddenly disconnected from the world, often zoning out and staring at walls, unmoving. Then being gaslit into believing I was acting out or causing problems for others.
I want to highlight many moments and experiences that show how severe certain impacts can be on a child — especially the surprising differences in how children process situations. For example, a tired parent snapping or yelling may be understandable to another adult… but to a child, it’s deeply personal. The child often internalizes it as they are the problem.
I prayed many times to God that if I survived, I would share my story and use it as a case study for others to learn from. That does mean being open to ridicule and mockery — which honestly scares me — but if it could help someone like me when I needed it, then I’ll do it anyway.
Since when has my life been just for me, anyway? At the very least, I can trust that if something greater is at work, the impact and benefits will far outweigh the pain it may cost me.
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Continuing from prior about the FitF Photo Albums~
*This photo is a snapshot of part of what I do in this process.
This ministry, Fathers in the Field, focuses on mentoring fatherless boys with adult men. These mentors go through background checks (I believe two levels) and are required to have a wife or female church champion included in all conversations for accountability when talking to the mother. They also have a female church champion to help keep up with any concerns the mother may have. The mentor father is to minimize contact with the mom because she is not the focus of the ministry. There is another one at the church specifically for her. There’s a strong support system in place to help both the boys and the mentor fathers focus on building those relationships.
John and I support this work by helping with tech — uploading photos or troubleshooting issues — while I create the albums. Each album is a collection of photos the mentor father takes during their outings, creating a memory book of their experiences together.
Most of these mentors are older and generally not the artsy type. They tend to focus more on outdoor activities like hunting and fishing. There are some artsy mentors, but many don’t feel they have much to offer in that area — at least, that’s been my observation from our involvement.
Once the photos are printed, I go through and remove duplicates, unrelated images, photos of people that don’t include either the child or the mentor, and any pictures where someone’s backside is facing the camera — unless it’s clearly relevant to the story.
Sometimes a candid fishing photo catches someone bending into the water with their rear front and center, and I try to leave those out as much as possible.
I also remove photos that are too blurry unless they capture something meaningful in context. For example, a blurry image on its own might look terrible — but if the next photo shows them shaking the camera and laughing, that blurry shot suddenly becomes part of the story and has value.
As I work, I stack the photos into sets by events. These will be organized chronologically later. I lay out all the photos that pass the first round of removals — many of which are not printed in order — so I either have to make educated guesses or refer back to the Google Drive where the photos are supposed to be uploaded. With an older generation who are still physically active and busy, photos often aren’t uploaded consistently, and when they are, they sometimes all end up with the same date. If the mentors can recall the general sequence of events, that helps — otherwise, I turn into a bit of a detective to place what I can’t confirm.
It’s physically taxing work. It hurt my back quite a bit, and it feels a little strange to be staring at people for long periods of time. But I have to study faces closely — age, blemishes (when something appeared and when it was healing), clothing, and other details — to help timestamp a photo. Any time I find myself repeatedly doing something like this, I can’t help but wonder what skill it’s building toward for the future.
The photos are first laid out chronologically, ideally in sets of four, then twos, threes, or single images as needed. My goal isn’t to just place images on pages, but to tell a story that flows naturally from one event to the next — without abrupt jumps. For example, I don’t want ten photos from one outing followed by a random picture of a tree before jumping to the next event.
I also try to color-match inserts with nearby photos and add verses, quotes, sayings, or written reflections from the mentor father about that experience. They usually prepare what they want written ahead of time, and I help organize or clean it up so it’s readable and cohesive.
Each album takes at least six hours to complete. I intentionally use all of my skills — photography, art, storytelling, and creating long-term emotional connections between two people I may barely know. I even think about the user experience of flipping through the album itself. Photo orientation matters more than people realize; too many portrait-oriented images placed poorly can strain your neck having to tilt left and right. I have a standard layout approach to help reduce that, and I hope it makes the experience more comfortable as well.
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Now I'll quickly run through our current expected schedule for the next two months.
February
8th – ATCs at Rainy Day Anime from 11am–1pm! We’ll be working on Postage Stamp ATCs while enjoying a fun, themed treat to match. You won’t want to miss this one. It’s an easy craft with the option to make it more complex and uniquely yours, while still going home with at least one planned card design we know you’ll love.
14th – Our Christian Craft Fellowship will be holding its first meeting of the year from 11am–1pm at our home! Sign up through our church, The Road at Chapel Hills, to join us. We’ll be exploring various crafts and projects that blend faith and art together. These are not simple VBS-style crafts — these will be true works of ART by the end. It’s a hands-on experience designed to help you process and reflect on what we discover and learn from the Bible.
21st – Paper Day at Who Gives a Scrap from 11am–3pm. For $5, you’ll get access to dozens of pounds of vintage ephemera for your projects. You can leave with a pound of curated items, or stay and craft with local artists to chat and learn from. We hope to be there if health allows.
March
7th – Another Who Gives a Scrap craft fair! We’ll be attending and showing off our newest artwork. Some of the pieces I’ve shared — and possibly some of John’s — should be ready and available for sale at this first event of the year. Stop by and say hello! We’d love to see you and share our little joys. The fair should be open from 10am–4pm, but I’ll double-check.
14th – Our next ATC Event at Rainy Day Anime, same time (11am–1pm). We don’t have a set theme yet — it will depend on what we’re able to plan during the month. As always, expect a buffet of art supplies and materials to play with.
28th – The first Art Swap of the year with Who Gives a SCRAP! This one will be at Penrose, and we’ll be there hosting an ATC table. Don’t forget — there will only be THREE total swaps for 2026. The next two will be in August and November.
I think that’s everything for now. We’re hoping to get a studio at Who Gives a SCRAP sometime this year, if things allow. If that happens, we have so many class ideas we’re excited to host, and we’d love to share the small odds and ends we create. You may end up seeing us even more if we have a studio there! We honestly have enough ideas for a new class every day — not that we have the energy for all of them… but we could if we had help. How exciting would that be?
I think that about wraps everything up. I’d love to say I’ll always get these out on time — but I’m not going to force that expectation on myself this year. Just within the first week, at least. I’m going through a lot, and rest is more needed right now. The consistency will grow when it’s time.
John is writing — but more of his personal story than anything else — and he hasn’t started the next newsletter yet. So expect one next month instead. He’s very close to fully completing an art set, and I don’t want to interrupt a creative flow he’s almost never been in, so we’re letting this one slide.
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This year, we’re pushing our business to the next level! We’ll be ordering tools and specific materials to support our bigger plans.
It’s wild to think that just two years ago, we were terrified to hand out business cards. But with consistency — and people absolutely loving our cute, derpy mascot — we’ve grown so much.
How far do you think we’ll go by the end of the year?
You’re coming along for the ride with us, right?
Let’s have fun and get creating!! See you in the next post!
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